Been there

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Posts by Been there

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  17

  How do you 'feel' loved?

  by Maverick in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  tony robbins claims there are three basic ways people 'feel' loved.

  some need to be told.

  for them hearing those words expresses love.

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  Been there

  Celia, after 5 years of hinting (and marriage) he did get me a ring.
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  17

  How do you 'feel' loved?

  by Maverick in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  tony robbins claims there are three basic ways people 'feel' loved.

  some need to be told.

  for them hearing those words expresses love.

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  Been there

  My husband does two things that I'm sure he thinks tells me he loves me. He says I love you when he hangs up and he opens my car door. Telling me he loves me but in no way showing it, doesn't mean a thing to me. I can open my own car door. If he is showing me it is so weak I'm not picking up on it. I need to be touched (mostly in the heart) He can't stand to be touched (unless I mean business) and he only touches me when he means business, he's hurt my feelings and disappointed me so much over the years (there ain't no business).

  I also put alot of importance on presents. Since I never got them as a kid and was not celebrated in anyway I somehow equate it to love or being lovable. He is a miserable gift giver. He gave me a candy bar for my Birthday one year. I feel that if you can't put any thought into a present you don't love me. It doesn't have to cost a penny, just has to say you are special to me, I pay enough attention to you to know what will make you happy. He could care less about presents. He says "You have the checkbook, you can buy what ever you want". Where do they sell husbands? I have grown to not care about them either. I am not worthy I am convinced. He forgot our 23rd wedding anniversary in May. All I could say was "Don't worry about it, it doesn't matter". I does matter though. I think I'll go have a good cry. Send presents................
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  40

  Surname Change: your opinions please

  by RAYZORBLADE in

  1. social
  2. family

  hey folks.. i have been debating for some time about changing my surname.. as it stands, it's in its typical patriarchial form (my father's surname) and honestly, i'd like to change it to my mother's surname.. i would not deny that my father was my father, but i cannot say that he, or his family have been ever there for me.

  my memories of them, for the most part are awful.. my mother is no angel, nor is she perfect, but i do have some connection to that side, and my grandmother (maternal) is my number 1 support person in the family.

  when i think back at family that were there for me during rough times, it was relatives on my mom's side.

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  Been there

  Ray,

  MacLeod does have a nice ring to it. I think it is very easy and cheap to change your name. Go to the court house they can put you in the right direction. You could even hyphanate your name.

  I've been looking for years for a friend I grew up with in Canada in the Freelton, Ont. congregation. Her name was Audrey MacLeod. I'm thinking her dad's name was John, she had older brothers named John, Russell ?, a younger brother named Skyler who died at 8 yrs. old. There were about 6 or 7 kids. Any relative of yours? It's hard to keep track of girls because they grow up and get married and change their names.

  Been there
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  58

  Just wanted to say goodbye

  by Aztec in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm going to be offline for quite a while.

  i'm moving this weekend and the computer i use belongs to my sister.

  since i will no longer be living with her i won't have daily access to a computer.

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  Been there

  ((((((((Aztec & Son))))))))

  Good Luck in your new life direction, it can be fun and scary but you will do great. We'll miss you. Let us know for sure you got the job. If you are ever down this neck of the woods again.......give a holler. Take care and come back when you can.

  Been There
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  41

  Old board member here..an anonymous thread; Depression-a little help please

  by aspiration in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hi.. i am a long time member of the board, but i am too embarrassed to put this under my username.

  if people 'discover' who this is, please keep it to yourselves.

  simon, my apologies, but please understand why i created the username.

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  Been there

  You will be strong again............you are just taking a much needed rest. You have used up all your reserves. Things are off kilter. Just as the Leaning Tower of Piza was once straight, it is a little off kilter, it still has a good strong foundation but is in need of a little support because of all the years of holding all those people up.

  The thing about telling someone about a problem is being accountable after that.........Did you call your doctor? You do sound clinically depressed, and yes it can be different symptoms at different times. Please get some medication that will fix the problem and not just cover it up (drinking). I've been where you are and it is a very dark place. You can not be there for your wife whom you love and care for.....where can she go if not to you. You have taken the first step to recovery, the right medication can take you the rest of the way. The longer you think about it or put it off, that is precious time you could be getting back to the old you that everyone loves and misses. I'm sure they have noticed you have not been yourself. You are in a deep dark well looking up, the light is there and there are many hands here reaching down to give you a hand up, just keep talking so we know where you are.

  Healing thoughts going your way. Take care. You are not weak........only human.
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  41

  The Enormity of what Simon Has Done

  by berylblue in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  from another thread:.

  simon is now probably britains public enemy number one in watchtower eyes.

  his forum has helped so many escape from the organisation.

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  Been there

  I've said it before and I'll say it many times, thanks so much Simon & Ang & the boys for giving us your time. Some times we don't deserve your time of day. But you stick with us and always try to improve so you can get the most bang for the buck. Alot of people here are forever in your debt for giving us a place to heal and grow. Many have grown alot faster then the rest of us and have moved on, many are still waiting to get up the nerve to jump in. Thanks everyone where ever you are in your journey.
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  7

  Just broke up with my girlfriend

  by figureheaduk in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i posted a thread last night about trying to find the best way to break things off with my (unbaptized) jw girlfriend.

  for more details see http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/54192/1.ashx or look at my personal profile.

  i had some replies (all of them helpful) so this morning i phoned her and asked could i go over and see her.

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  Been there

  Very glad to hear things worked out well for you. Please do hang around and you can introduce us to any new lady loves. I know it's a little soon for that but we'll wait. You will be sooooooooo much happier. I do feel bad for your ex's decision though. So Dumb.................take care.
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  31

  Jesika/Aztec and everyone!

  by Ron1968 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hi jesika and aztec,.

  i hope you can help me to get to know everyone better here.

  this is a really huge forum from what i am used to.

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  Been there

  Welcome to the board Ron, glad to have ya. Are you sure you want to hang out with Jesika & Aztec? I hear they are "Bad Association"..................but I like them anyway. It does take awhile to get the hang of things around here sometimes but well worth it. A very healing place. You won't see much of me but I am always here.
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  54

  We did it -- we're married now!!

  by Gopher in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  june 20th marked a new beginning for me and yourschelbie.. we had a justice-of-the-peace wedding, with just a few family and friends on hand.

  the judge did a marvelous job of capturing the essence of the meaning of marriage in just a few minutes.

  (and we weren't reminded that serving a publishing company should be the #1 priority in life, lol.).

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  Been there

  Congratulations and Best Wishes for a long and happy marriage to both of you.

  (Close your eyes, I'm throwing rice)
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  42

  Finally! Some good news in my life!

  by Aztec in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i've been having a rough go financially lately and my job is less than rewarding.

  my hours have slowly been cut back over the last few months to the point where i've had to decide between food and bills.

  however, my sister's friend brought me a job ad.

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  Been there

  Congrats Aztec!

  I can just feel your excitement thru the computer. You know you can do it!!!!!!!! Even if you can't, fake it . Keep us posted. If you get it.......take your sisters friend out to lunch or sumpin nice for keeping an eye out for you. Heck take your sister too for having such a nice friend. You can afford it now......................Good Luck.